Bollywood Movie of the Week: Kabhi Alvida Naa Kehna

Kabhi Alvida Naa Kehna, 2006



It's Kinda Like: Not sure . . . the most tragic romantic comedy ever?

Directed by: Karan Johar

Produced by: Hiroo Johar

Starring: Shahrukh Khan, Rani Mukerji, Preity Zinta, Abhishek Bachchan, Amitabh Bachchan, Kirron Kher

Note: among those in the know, this movie is referred to as KANK. Yeah, no kidding.

This is sort of a blast from the recent past, with a huge all-star cast. But my Bollywood class is doing a song from it, so I thought I'd mentally revisit it. I saw this kind of awhile ago, and one thing stuck with me: its unusually high-contrast genres. There are parts of this movie that are outlandishly cheesy, and parts that are punch-someone-in-the-face tearjerky (I'm not big on the tearjerker genre ;o). Overall I'm pretty sure I enjoyed it, though they drag out that drama To Its Utmost. It's an earl(ier) directing effort by Karan Johar, and not his very best.

This film is packed with stars, all doing their starry best in roles that suit them. There's Shahrukh Khan, today's most (?) famous Bollywood star, playing the comic/tragic love interest to the solid and stolid Rani Mukerji -- rounding out the love square (?) are their spouses, respectively played by the adorably bubbly Preity Zinta and the charmingly petulant Abhishek Bachchan (do they call him the Little B?). Parents in the film are played by yesterday's favorite Bollywood action hero, now Bollywood's favorite dad and narrator -- here he is, everyone's favorite, the Big B -- Amitabh Bachchan, and everyone's favorite most huggable Bollywood mom, Kirron Kher. All the stars are out, and they're emoting up a storm.

With four essentially likeable people involved in the Love Square, the sad parts are that much sadder, and of course there's every Romantic Misunderstanding and Missed Moment that you could think of. (If you're studying to remount Love At First Sight, Jennifer Kah, this would be a great microcosm of Romantic Distress.) And yet it's that kind of movie where the main characters are so in love that their time together is mostly spent crying because they feel So Guilty For Being In Love.

But there's also comedy, my friends -- for what is Bollywood if not for everyone? Of course Shahrukh Khan's character is charming, irreverent, witty, ever the jester and gadfly (when he's not doing that thing he does where he's sucking air through his lips in a Brave Attempt Not to Cry -- I'll have to imitate it for you). And then there's The Big B, who plays his real-life son's father in the film. In what might be a parody of their actual relationship, Amitabh's character Samarjit Singh Talwar goes by "Sexy Sam," and keeps being discovered by his son in corners, canoodling with young white hotties, a different one every scene. (Whenever he appears onscreen, he gets his own "Sexy Sam" background singers in the score. Awesome!) And his outfits are HIGH-larious. See this highlarious turtleneck and fur-collar jacket? He wears this in this movie.

And the musical numbers are half cheesy sadness and half cheesy goodness. Here are the cheesy-goodness songs from this movie, which, though they seem to fall from nowhere, are nonetheless welcome for their unabashed wackiness.

First: the song we're doing a choreography to -- I include this YouTube clip which has the dialogue preceding it, exposing all the romantic entanglements in a nutshell. (And of course, the parents have a longtime romantic rivalry too -- here they meet at the sumptuous party and trade barbs -- she asks him, "Oh, is that your daughter?" and when he finally ends the conversation, the chick asks Amitabh, "Who was that?" he replies, "My mother.")The scenes preceding the song are only about half in English, but the body language is pretty universal, and sets up the rivalries better than a lengthy plot explanation could. (also, watch out for Sexy Sam! he's got his own the actual lines from this song: "Sexy Sam, Sexy Sam, wham bam, wham bam, thank you, Sam." No kidding, watch for it around 5:20 in this clip):



Now, wouldn't you guess that that song came from a COMEDY? But comedy is just tragedy that you laugh at, and they stop laughing for the second act. Even this song doesn't manage to tip the genre scale, and it's pretty awesome . . . . And now, here and blaring from clubs worldwide, it's everyone's favorite hilarious party anthem . . .


(even more hilarious: both likely "item girls" are in this movie already -- and Kajol is a surprise Item Girl in the first song posted -- so there's kind of an "item guy" here -- the DJ is John Abraham, muscle-man star of action films like Dhoom.)

And then watch the genres collide! That's Bollywood for you -- there's enough time to see both sides of everything. The complications from comedy become tragic. The lousy spouses might be nice people. The silly father becomes noble. Romantic gestures turn practical and vice-versa. Will love triumph? And will throwing popcorn at the TV make it happen FASTER, already? Find out when you watch it.

Verdict: Mixed . . . depends on your mood? There are so many great actors doing their thing that they're fun to watch. And if you like heckling, there's plenty of over-the-top tearjerking to heckle. Again, depending on your mood, it's either a fun romantic comedy that suddenly runs off the rails into the Grand Canyon dug by all that crying, or else it's a Sumptuously Tragic Romance that springs from a silly comedy. Definitely a solid example of that kind of Bollywood tragicomedy romance.

Bollywood Movie of the Week: Wake Up Sid

Wake Up Sid, 2009
Directed by: Ayan Mukerji

Produced by: Karan Johar

Starring: Ranbir Kapoor, Konkona Sen Sharma, Anupam Kher, Supriya Pathak, Rahul Khanna, Kashmira Shah

It's Kinda Like: Overboard meets Maid to Order, without the amnesia?

This week's Bollywood movie is a great complement to last week's Rocket Singh: Salesman of the Year. Both movies came out the same year, and both star Ranbir Kapoor. And between the two, he shows off his versatility, playing two opposite characters in the two films. (Both of which films, by the way, were delightful.)

Both films begin with the same circumstances: school is almost out, and the college students are graduating. And, both Kapoor's characters -- Harpreet Singh Bedi in Rocket Singh and Siddharth "Sid" Mehra in Wake Up Sid -- haven't been doing so well in school. But there the similarity ends. HP Bedi is earnest, ambitious, and hardworking, just not great at school. You can see what happens to him in his movie. Sid, on the other hand, is the spoiled partyboy son of uber-rich parents, barely scraping by in school because he can't be bothered to put in any work. He loves his carefree existence -- until graduation, when his slacker friends have somehow managed to squeeze out passing grades, leaving him alone at the bottom. He is, of course, super angry at them for this. To top it off, his dad wants him to start right away working in the office at the family business.

At their graduation party, Sid meets Aisha (Konkona Sen Sharma, who I'm pleased to see keeps getting cast in better and better films). Aisha has moved to Mumbai all on her own that very afternoon, leaving everyone she knows, in search of a dream job. She's a little older than Sid and anxious that he not get "the wrong idea," since they're hitting it off so awfully well. He shows her the city and they exchange numbers; she's thankful to find ONE friend in Mumbai, at least.

And of course Sid's time in the office doesn't go so well, despite the fancy SUV he's promised if he comes to work for a whole two weeks. After a falling-out, he leaves home and with nowhere else to go, crashes at Aisha's place. Hilarity ensues, mostly based on Sid's total inability to take care of himself. (See? Like Overboard meets Maid to Order!)

While Rocket Singh is a quirky, understated movie that feels like an indie, Wake Up Sid feels more like an 80s film: it's more exuberant, and slightly goofy. Kapoor is equally likeable in both roles, and in Wake Up Sid he's charmingly petulant. And the costume design is equally delightful, with him cycling through a neverending (and enviable) wardrobe of superhero, comic book, and Star Wars t-shirts (which of course are chosen for the scenes, well done designers). (I believe he also has Spongebob sheets.) The music, too, is really catchy -- heavily acoustic guitar based, for a true-feeling modern college graduate feel. (Similar to the music from 3 Idiots.)

Here's a song from early in the film -- see his adorable carefree ways? And this song is *ridiculously* catchy. ("Kya Karoon" loosely translates to "What should I do?," or "What do I do?")


Just like in Overboard and Maid to Order (I LOVE those movies!), Sid's transformation/coming-of-age is immensely satisfying to watch, while not being overly unrealistic. And the film's question is how to become the *right amount* of grown up; it's possible to go too far -- or at least far enough to become just no fun at all.

Verdict: I kind of loved this movie. Watch it, and go through your own end-of-school, beginning-of-summer transformation. Enjoy, and happy summer!

It Takes Two . . . to Make a Coincidence

I just watched TWO completely unrelated pieces of media, which both incorporated a certain song. And in each piece, characters used the song as a sort of camaraderie test: if you knew the lyrics, you were of an age, and could be friends. A sort of communal open-secret guilty pleasure, if you will.

What were the pieces of media?
1. The Proposal, starring Sandra Bullock and Ryan Reynolds -- which, though predictable in structure and plot (cause really, I mean helloooo) was actually, in its dedicated snarkiness, quite hilariously delightful!
2. Episode 21 ("Mamma Mia") of Season Three of 30 Rock

What was the song? If you haven't guessed from the post title, perhaps you fail the test? See below. (I think for my contemporaries I might have picked "Ice Ice Baby" . . . thoughts?)

Enjoy!

Bollywood Movie of the Week: Rocket Singh: Salesman of the Year

(Netflix streaming of Bollywood movies = awesome!)

Rocket Singh: Salesman of the Year, 2009
Directed by: Shimit Amin
Produced by: Yash Raj Films

Starring: Ranbir Kapoor, Shazahn Padamsee, Sharon Prabhakar, Gauhar Khan, Prem Chopra, Manish Choudhary

It's Kinda Like: If Wes Anderson directed Office Space, a little bit . . . mixed with some IT Crowd, but serious.

(Note: Beware of Netflix film descriptions; this is the blurb from their site: "Versatile Bollywood talent Ranbir Kapoor stars in this romantic comedy as Rocket Singh, a salesman hustling his trade in a flush economy. In fact, Singh is performing so well at work that he decides to start a company -- within the same company. In his effort to keep his venture under wraps, Singh soon adds con artist to his list of credentials." Did they WATCH the movie? Approximately 75% of this is Entirely, Entirely False. His name is NOT Rocket Singh, he's sucking at work, the economy is NOT necessarily great, and he's NOT a con artist; his whole thing is being completely honest with everyone. Nice going, interns who apparently wrote this blurb.)

This movie was really great! And with a very "Western Cinema Indie Film" aesthetic -- quirky, understated, actors that look like Real People instead of plastic heroes. The opening reminded me a little of something like Rushmore, or The Royal Tenenbaums, with its offbeat, stylized approach to cinematography and characterization. No dance numbers, no Hot Romantic B-story, but an excellent satisfying underdog story. A quiet, quirky comedy, or maybe a comedy-drama -- with the necessary Terrible Things happening around the intermission, as per the Bollywood structure.

Ranbir Kapoor performs admirably as our hero, Harpreet Singh Bedi (not "Rocket," Netflix!), a hopeful, earnest college graduate who didn't exactly get the best grades ever. But he knows how to deal with people. Kapoor is adorably forthright, decked out in a neverending palette of stripes (at once childlike AND an indication that he's on the Straight and Narrow) and a dizzying array of colored turbans. At the outset, he's kind of like a little old man-child (not unlike Rushmore): he wears horizontal striped T-shirts like Ernie, he dances in that embarrassing dad way, he wears *short-sleeved buttondowns,* he's rocking the turban and the beard (no one else is Sikh in the film but his grandpa, forcing him visually even more into the minority), and he seems cheerfully unconcerned by his uncoolness. "HP," as his friends call him, is determined to get a great job like all his friends, so he decides to go into sales--he's a people person, after all. Sales of what? Who cares! Wherever he can get an interview.

Here, look how cute he is:


Far from the suave con man that Netflix indicates he is, HP is actually wide-eyed and innocent, unaware of the cutthroat techniques employed by businessmen. His new mentor, Nitin (played with excellent smarminess by Naveen Kaushik, sporting some truly awesome douchebaggish facial hair), quickly shows him both the quick thinking needed by salesmen, and the routine dirty tricks. HP is appalled by the casual dishonesty employed by his new colleagues.

Through a complicated series of events, HP finds himself running a rival company from within the bigger company. In an Office Space type way, he's quietly subversive, while maintaining his own personal integrity.

The characters in this film are all slightly unexpected -- again a la Wes Anderson. Since it's not your typical Bollywood Romance, the characters have that real-life tinge; like in The Royal Tenenbaums they come off as *slightly* sad, with a hint of wilted skeeviness, as if you're made uncomfortable by your own voyeurism of their perfectly ordinary lives. Harpreet Singh lives in a flat with his grandpa, who is so gleefully young for his age that they're more like cranky brothers. Giri (D. Santosh), the IT guy, is like an Indian version of Roy from The IT Crowd: greasy curly hair, unkempt appearance, nearly horizontal posture in his desk chair, personal schedule entirely unconcerned with the actual time of day, and an open predilection for "porn," which in this case being a family movie is pictures of ladies in swimsuits. Koena the receptionist (Gauhar Khan) is always being hit on -- but she's not really THAT hot, or scantily-dressed or anything, she's just better looking than anyone else in the office. They're ordinary, with the reality-volume turned up a notch. Stylized.

I think just the premise is enough; a lot more happens that I won't spoil for you. Suffice it to say, it's a great underdog movie with an awesome villain (Prem Chopra as Mr. Bedi, the boss, with his perfectly-kept frownyface mustache), a quiet and entirely engaging hero in Harpreet Singh, a delightfully dangerous predicament (starting a rival company from inside), and a satisfying conclusion. A nice-looking, well made film. Enjoy!

(This trailer gives the *most* accurate flavor of the trailers that I could find . . . )

How to be Fascinating

(Or, how to be the coolest ten-year-old around.)

Step one: Buy a scooter. I have this one; it's the Razor A5-Lux:



Step two: Fall off it.

The combination of these two things (and the accompanying bandaids that ensue) will surely earn you street cred with fifth-graders nationwide. You will receive comments like: "Whoooooa, where'd you get a scooter with wheels that big?" and "Wow, what happened to you?" and "This one time, I had a scrape so big that you could see the fat under it!"

(Don't worry--I'm fine. ;o)

I was having a very fantastic ten-year-old sort of day, though. Scootin' around in my jean pedalpushers and giant sneakers, scrapin' my knee like a scamp, scootin' down to get some ice cream, all under the breezy-treesy warmth of a May afternoon. Ahhh, the approaching end of a school year. Is there any better feeling? Even if you're not IN school anymore.

Also: a scooter IS a great way to be fascinating. It turned the heads of all kinds of people, including fifth graders, old ladies with walkers, the guy behind the counter at the Chinese bakery who's never before been inclined to conversation, and hipsters who *also* have scooters.

It's probably a bonus amount of interesting since I'm neither a boy nor a hoodlum. That's what I'm here for. Bringing you cognitive dissonance since 1978.

Enjoy your May day!

Bollywood Movie of the Week: Koi . . . Mil Gaya

Since it's nearing summertime and everyone is in kind of a crazy mood (ever try to teach school in the month of May? Thank god I get to teach drama and not, say, math), here's an extra-silly selection for Bollywood of the Week.

Koi . . . Mil Gaya, 2003

Directed & Produced by: Rakesh Roshan

Starring: Rekha, Hrithik Roshan, Preity Zinta, Rakesh Roshan

It's Kinda Like: ET meets Flowers for Algernon, aka Charley, meets The Nutty Professor. There are also parts that remind me of The Sound of Music. Crazy-squee!

The title means "I've . . . Found Someone," which is pleasingly ambiguous in reference. To whom do you refer, O mysterious I? Your wanna-be girlfriend? Or a Visitor From Beyond . . .

Hrithik Roshan, awesome dancer extraordinaire, plays Rohit, our simple-minded hero. Left thusly, we are led to understand, from a car accident resulting from his father's obsession with UFOs, he nevertheless leads a mostly peaceful and adorable existence living with his mom and playing with all his 11-year-old friends. (Roshan is super cute and appealing in this role, too. Awww!)

He's also got an awfully pretty lady for a friend: Nisha, played by Preity Zinta. She's fond of him in the same way that she'd be fond of a neighbor kid. BUT, of course, all that changes when . . . the ALIENS come. Because they've been accidentally PHONED. From HOME. And one alien gets left behind. (Sounding familiar, film fans?) Vocab lesson: Rohit and Nisha call their adorable blue alien friend Jadoo, which means MAGIC. You will learn this when they sing the hilarious song of the same name. And you will not be able to forget it afterwards, so insistent are they on saying that word. Jadoooooooooo . . . . .

Just like a certain alien whom Terry Pratchett has observed resembles a friendly turd in a bike basket, Jadoo is good at things like healing . . . including maybe brains? Begin Flowers for Algernon segment of plot. And both plots unfold together, more or less as you would think. (With pauses for Sound-of-Music-like jaunts with adults and children through the lovely green and mountainous Canadian landscapes -- riding on adorable scooters. Awwww!)

This movie is kinda super silly -- the alien's animatronic and CG nature is hilariously lo-tech (even F.T, aka Friendly Turd, is more realistic), and the song they sing with the aliens kinda made me laugh uproariously and not in the good way. And it also turns into The Nutty Professor, complete with basketball game. Whaaa, you ask? Whaaa indeed.

That being said, Hrithik is very appealing and endearing in his role, and Preity Zinta is always fun too. Plus the kids are great -- and it's fun to watch him interacting with them as if he's just one more in the gang. He moves well both as a dancer and an actor, and the dances (choreographed by the cheeky Farah Khan) are pretty adorable as well. This dance was apparently the one that garnered Farah Khan her award (note the references to classic Hollywood dance sequences -- part of why I love her!). He's just now starting to gain some surprise physical dexterity, from his helpful alien friend:



(Plus: in 2003, this actually won BEST MOVIE at India's Filmfare Awards --their Oscars-- as well as Best Actor for Hrithik with an extra Best Performance award, AND Best Director and Best Choreography. Is this movie, therefore, better than I thought? They even made a SEQUEL, I've just learned. I. Must. See. This. Sequel.)

The Verdict: Silly as all get-out, but silly in that old-kids-movie-you-used-to-love way, and similarly endearing. Like watching an old 80s movie. You know it's cheesy, and you know you love it.

Here's the trailer, for your viewing pleasure:

Bollywood Movie of the Week: Chance Pe Dance

(Can I just say, Netflix streaming on the Wii is awesome!)

Chance Pe Dance, 2010

Directed by: Ken Ghosh

Produced by: Ronnie Screwvala

Starring: Shahid Kapoor, Genelia D'Souza

It's Kinda Like: One of those "I'm going to make my way in B/Hollywood!" films, plus a dash of So You Think You Can Dance and a smidgin of (Insert Underdog Dance Team Film Here)

Overall, I found this movie delightful, though hardly a Serious Film Experience. Shahid Kapoor (the New Bollywood Hotness) is teen-idol dreamy, AND in this film, also adorably goofy and a funny physical actor (which I think is even better). The opening sequence with one long take of well-timed morning routine tasks, gently reminiscent of Chaplin and/or Rube Goldberg, is a great example of the carefree and slightly wacky tone of this film.

I mean, the base premise already has my attention: Young Person making their way in the world, taking odd jobs while slogging through the bottom ranks of the film industry. After everything in his life of course goes wrong, he winds up having to sleep in his car and take a job as a dance teacher for a crew of ornery middle-schoolers. (Sound familiar, people who know me? ;o)

Shahid is clearly the draw in this film -- his female star Genelia D'Souza is kind of a cipher, without much interesting to add (in fact, Wikipedia tells me they filmed half of it with a different female star first). Again, the plot is more or less your typical underdog film, but like all of these things, it's the details that make the movie unique. All the scenes of his Acting Career are really funny (like warming up in the mirror, and trying to audition for a commercial with a six-year-old costar), and the kids he winds up teaching are also hilarious and endearing. Awwww! And, most of the music sequences in the movie are stylized and/or cheesy-retro, very lighthearted and fresh-feeling.

It also feels a *little* like a kids' film (not that Bollywood really differentiates, which I think is great) -- for example, there's a number convincing the students that dance is Actually Awesome and Not For Losers -- it actually contains the lines (and yes, actually in English) "Dance is smokin, dance is moonwalk, Dance is groovin, makes the world round" and "Dance is super cool, Dance is hot hot ... You wanna hit big, there is no shorcut, So now get up, you gotta move your butt butt butt." But it's adorable, so it's OK. Here's the Music Video version, with some cheesy/hilarious editing:


Having what feels like a very similar career, I can't help being fascinated by the random details revealed. When he auditions on-camera, they have him hold up a chalkboard under his face, with his name and *phone number* on it. That seems odd, right? Is that normal? And the enormous, gorgeous multipurpose room at that school (a room still filled with crap, like every multi-use room) looks more like a church, with its huge banks of skylights, its second-level balcony and its excellent hardwood floors. Again -- normal, or movie-ridiculous? (And those bathrooms -- they're cavernous! Not to mention his crappy bare studio apartment. Is land really that cheap in Mumbai?)

Cute goofy star, endearing hilarious children (a cameo of a HUGE So You Think You Can Dance poster!) AND to top it all off, Shahid is also a genuinely good dancer. I watched the Making Of video for the song "Pump It Up," and it was amusing to hear the director recount how he realized that Shahid could actually do the whole dance all the way through (gasp!) so they could shoot the number more like a concert film than a music video. Here's the song in question, the video from the movie (look out ladies; he's even Super Ripped . . . they also point out in the Making Of video that he hasn't just got a six-pack, but an eight-pack -- videos of which you can ALSO find on YouTube):



Verdict: Adorable and not *too* silly; actors, dancers, and/or educators will probably find it extra adorable. A nice modernish take on the classic Underdog Showbiz Movie (can you say reality show?).